How To Play Basketball......

If your a shorty like me, have faith and hang upside-down off the clothes line.
Dribbling is the key to getting past your opponent. If you can dribble well, then they will stay away from you. So practise it.
Grunt and shout when you grab rebounds. They will stay away from you.
If you sweat a lot, your in luck. This will also keep defenders away from you.
If possible dye your hair in weird colours, pierce your body, this may also keep defenders away from you.
If you can't do the above, do a 360 through the legs-switch hands-behind the back pass. If it works then they'll think you are the key player and guard you when in fact you not.
If you get fouled, drop to the ground hold on to whatever body part you can and scream.
Get cheerleaders, they'll make your team score about 15 points more than usual, you'll be pulling off moves you've never done before etc.
If your gonna foul 'em, foul 'em hard!

Also How To.....

Um, may I please ask you to click on my sposor? It'll help me and I'll be motivated to put more stuff on here. Thanks very much.